The Glitch Hitch

So, whatever happened to my idea of travelling from Kanto to Unova (now Kalos)?

I’ll tell you what. Turn-of-the-century tech, that’s what.

Part of my aim is to complete the Kanto pokedex for the very first time, and for this, I have to rely on a highly tempramental link connection. Just balancing two GBA SP’s on my knee doesn’t really work, as I learned to my cost.

It duplicated my Bulbasaur, Saure, which is all very well and good (he has very high IV’s) but it sacrificed my Charmander, effectively meaning that I could no longer complete the game. Had it taken out Pidgey or Rattata, I might have moved on, but it killed off my Charmander.

I had several options. Firstly, to find another Charmander on another gen III game. Unfortunately, the majority of my gen III games have been emptied in the seemingly never-ending pursuit of Mew, and I have no spare Charmanders lying around. Secondly, to accept the fact that I was restarting “Yellow”, and move on. Thirdly, and as you will see, this is the option I chose, I could sulk.

The pros of sulking meant that I could devote my time wholeheartedly to the mind-numbing pursuit of pseudo-random number generator manipulation. I spent hours on Route 210 just to catch a shiny Machoke, and from there do a whole lot of incredibly geeky calculations in order not really to get anywhere, and certainly not acquire any of the pokemon I actually set out to get.

I descended the downward spiral of anally retentive pokefanning, gradually coming to hate these creatures and their coding.

But then gen VI came, with its buckets of nostalgia and almost no new pokemon. What do I care for new pokemon? I have a Blastoise called Stoisey and a level 60 Pikachu who I am NOT going to evolve, because then she won’t make proper noises any more. I’m also running around with a Blaziken- not my original Blaziken, who is one of my two oldest pokemon, but just another Blaziken. Still, it reminds me of that Blaziken.

And gradually, the dwindling flame of an embittered pokefan grew back into life.

I’m moving on, starting again, finding a new Pikachu and hopefully, not making that mistake again.

(Ey says).

If you would like to try your hand against a level 60 Pikachu, set in a team that hasn’t actually considered the existence of Fairy types yet (denial), my friend code is 2122-6131-6500.

Memory Link of a different kind

So. Casually browsing Huffpost, because it’s my favourite source of bad journalism, when I stroll across this little beauty:

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/2013/05/17/gamer-plays-with-same-pokemon-11-years_n_3291429.html?icid=maing-grid7%7Cukt1%7Cdl13%7Csec3_lnk4%26pLid%3D180196_ukt2

It tells the story of a man who has been using the same pokemon for 11 years. Now, having used the same pokemon since Ruby and Sapphire came out (10 years), I was a touch sceptical. Appropriately, it’s a Sceptile.

Reading on the guy’s actual blog, he knows his stuff. He’s certainly not claiming to have the oldest living pokemon, nor is he saying that Fire Red came out in 2002, as Huffpost claim. (This, by the way, is what happens when you don’t pay your writers, Huffpost.)

In fact, it’s just a charming little story about pokemon companionship, the real reason why adult pokefans pity kids today. I grew up with Skeptyleia- Don’t criticise the name, I was eleven years old – and even though he’s not my best pokemon, he is my oldest.

He’s not been quite the star that Cunzy11’s Dactylocer has. He’s not had any children, and he’s only recently cracked level 60, because he’s a grass type and I don’t see the point. Still, I wouldn’t have kept him if I wasn’t attached to him.

For anyone who doesn’t play pokemon, the bond between a player and a bunch of ones and zeros can be a little tricky to understand. I know Skeptyleia isn’t real. I know he’s not a very good pokemon. Still, that doesn’t matter.

I was eleven years old. I had a different name. I used to sit up all night, using a lit screen magnifier to sit playing in the dark without rousing the suspicions of my parents. Skeptyleia may just be a bunch of ones and zeros, but he’s a link to a child I used to be, half a lifetime ago.

Skeptyleia sits calmly at the back of my party, waiting for a water/ground type pokemon to turn up. When electricity fails, it’s his chance to shine.

He’s not the only relic from my younger days. In fact, I’ve kept most of them. A level 92 Swellow called Tialauuenz with preposterously low IVs. Twenty-six Zigzagoons, conceived in one game and hatched in three. Most sentimentally of all, a piece of mail, marked: “Remember me and her. Kai.”

When I got Ruby and Sapphire, I played as a female character called Alex, and a male character called Kai. After completing Sapphire, I made the decision to start again, uprooting Tialauuenz, Skeptyleia, Kombausken, Lynayonooi and his entire family of baby Zigzagoons. But I left myself a reminder- a single piece of mail, brought to Pokemon Pearl via the Pal Park.

Unfortunately, that piece of imaginary paper can travel no further in my games. Transporting items between gen IV and gen V is impossible. I can only hope they never do the same to my Skeptyleia.

March ’13 Sitrep

Well, since claiming last summer I was to ‘start at New Bark town and finish up in Unova’ or beyond, I haven’t even started. I’ve bought a few cartridges to replace the ones I’ve lost, and lost a few to keep equilibrium with the ones I’ve bought.

I’ve come to realise that with Pokemon, I don’t really know what I’m doing yet. I doubt I ever will, as playing in geek mode seems to be quite time consuming. I’ve sampled the delights of Bulbapedia, and learnt more from it than ever sane person should ever wish to know.

So, before I start making a real effort to clean up my games and start over, here’s a rundown on my current games.

Red/Yellow/Blue- No idea where they are, and I’ve decided not to use them anyway. Might have a bit of a squee if I find Blue, but I’m fairly sure the other two are with primary school friends of mine.

Gold/Silver- Broken and lost.

Crystal- Never owned, and never saw the point. Only time I ever played it, I played as a boy anyway.

Ruby- Having sent all the decent pokemon to the Pal Park, am using it to breed Dratinis, Charmanders, Growlithes, Larvitars and Laprases. So I have many. Don’t ask me why; I’m struggling to remember.

Sapphire- No idea. Think it may be in the office of Martin & Co Swindon, but aside from that, no idea at all.

Emerald- Five badges. Trying to catch Groudon, then I can happily send it all to the Pal Park and have done with it.

FireRed- I have two, and don’t really remember why. On one, I started with Squirtle and have one badge. The other has no save file. So, I’m good to go on those.

LeafGreen- Also missing. Have defeated the Elite Four and all that jazz, and was in the process of training up to defeat my partner (who has a level 90+ Mewtwo and level 80+ Charizard, Steelix, Tyranitar, Vaporeon and something else scary and toothy). So, even if I did know where it was, I’d only use it to flail desperately in his direction.

Pearl- Completed the main quest around five years ago, about a week after I bought it. Have been playing for 140+ hours, which is slightly embarrassing. Irritatingly, I’m 16 pokemon away from completing the Pokedex, and seeing as I haven’t managed that in 12 years of playing, I’m damned if I don’t do it.

Diamond- I have seven badges, and am currently climbing up Mt Coronet to find my first Dialga, which I will instantly trade over to Pearl to help fill the pokedex. I will then carry on trying to catch the Pokemon needed on Pearl and then probably give up completely once I’ve got them.

Platinum- Also using to supplement Pearl. On four badges and embarrassingly stuck trying to get the fifth. May borrow stupidly powerful pokemon from other games to get past gym leader 5.

HeartGold- Not got Lugia and that’s about it. Currently, most pokemon are infected with Pokerus, which is nice.

SoulSilver- Actually, I’m in a position to stop this one. No badges, and I seem to have traded off all the decent pokemon.

Black- I have two, again, for no real reason. One’s nicely completed, with some lovely juicy Pokemon on it. The other one seems just to be a vessel to carry a Snivy in.

White- I have one badge, and seem to have started with Oshawott. I expect I didn’t get further because Bianca and Cheren irritate the shit out of me.

Black 2- Not got it. Happy to cross that bridge when it comes to it, to be honest. I have enough games in progress.

White 2- Only just bought, and super excited about it as it’s a squillion times better than white. Had it for two days and on course for badge number 5.

So, out of 20 games, I owned 18, 16 still work, I know where eleven are and am in a position to stop on four, two of which I have duplicate cartridges of.

In conclusion- Phase one of the Sandslach blog: Find Sapphire and LeafGreen; complete the Sinnoh Dex; start emptying Gen III cartridges.